smile

I love getting letters and personal notes. This may be the weirdest one I've ever gotten though.

Dear Elise,
I don't really know how to tell you this, but your nostrils are insulting. I think I realized it when your dwarf bit me in your closet and I saw you sit on my illegitamite child in Ghana. I'm sure you're midle-class enough to understand that I may pee my pants. I'm returning your toe ring to you, but I'll keep the results of that blood-sample as a memory. You should also know that I will not tell the authorites that you stole the whale from the backyard. and our friendship is ruined and I'm scratching my butt as you read this.
Greetings to your frog Leonard,
Sarah