banging on a trash can

So I'm sitting here at Panera, well I've been here for 2 hours using the internet and refilling my cup...ha. I'm a bum I know. But yeah, no internet for a while. Not everything has been working out the way I thought, planned, prayed, and wished they would. BUT I'm coming to terms with it all I suppose. I know God provides purposely and perfectly for our lives. So now I'm just hanging out and debating what my next move should be...Definitely taking my time though. I do really like my new place and will love it once I have the internet. Only five more days left of summer school and then I'm off until the 28th! :) Pretty sweet deal aye? Abbie is coming to see me next week and I'm going to get to see Nate and Erika this weekend! So many blessings are coming my way I know. AND I just saw a tall kid walk into a light in Panera! :) ha. I only wish I was in a place where it would be socially acceptable to laugh out loud at him. Next week for summer school we're building a volcano...I'm pretty nervous about this, not going to lie. I've never done it before and to do it with a bunch of kids with Autism, well it should be interesting.

Also, I haven't really unpacked anything since my family left Sunday night. Man I miss them a lot. Well I really miss the hugs...which is crazy I know. But I really only get hugs at church and school, not at home. ha. Well only when I try to hug my lonely cat who follows me around everywhere. I rolled on top of him this morning cos I didn't know he was in bed with me lol.

So I'm off to the gym I suppose, to work it! ha yeah. Go and talk to the old ladies who love me. I'm really glad I enjoy the water aerobic classes at the gym. When I first started in March I was getting very bored just doing the machines...but I didn't want to do a floor class. So it only took stubborn me 4 months to try the water aerobic classes. It's fun, different, and also weird sweating in a pool, but I like it none the less. Hmm nothing else is really new. Some man is hovering around me waiting for fresh coffee....weird-o. I hope he doesn't start a conversation with me. Nothing against him, I'm just not a fan of talking to strangers, I guess cos you don't really get anything from it so I just feel like blah, why did I just do that. Yes, weird I know. I really need to pick up my shot glasses from 2 weeks ago, not like thet're good enough to sell, I just want to get them.

I can't wait to go home in August. I just want to relax. One thing I want to do, just lay in the grass at Elma's. and maybe go to Tobias Animal Farm, with Chad! =) and of course go to my home church :) ha. I really want to go tent camping but I don't see that happening, unless it's in someone's yard.

Ok this girl next to me is really whiney. She works here and is complaining about her hours, cos she wants more time off cos someone is visiting her and she hasn't seen them in 2 months and she needs to catch up with them. DUH Panera! Just your stuff together! The world obviously revolves around this girl. She keeps going on and on and on and on....stop cos now she's making me go on and on and on and on about how annoying she is, thus making me be annoying. Ok. I need to go to the gym so I can get some steam room in before water class.

Just Dance

Well I sign my lease today. I know it is crazy and ridiculous to others. Since the rent is a lot more than my rent now and I don't even know if I'll have a roommate. Yes, I know it seems crazy. But I haven't really been able to explain to anyone that as scary as it is that's ok. I have peace about, well God's given me peace. It'll work out and be okay. I've never been so sure about such a daring move in all of my life. But it'll be okay :)

So I'm going to go and start packing up my car, and start my new adventure in life :) Prayers are still welcomed on this move and situation.

So about today...

I'm not a vain person I swear...but I looked really cute today :) I had my nails did and wore a new skirt and yeah it was cuttttte! But then I went to the pool, my hair got wet, my nail polish all came off, and my skirt kinda clung to my semi-wet legs. and I thanked God for inner beauty! Cos I also looked a hott mess today! :)

Soooo. I am pretty much the worse packer procrastinator ever! Yeah, I did zero packing today, but I did make all the calls I needed to make today and I have to call back 2 people tomorrow. So tomorrow I will just be running around like a mad person, but someone has to do it.

No more internet for a week, well at my house. I probaly will be going to Panera or the library (i haven't been there in forever cos I owe them $3.60 :/ I'll live. I did ask the lady 3 times if she was sure the earliest they could come was next Thursday, I'm sure she thought I was insane. and just may be...

So I thought I would blog tonight since Jonnie yelled at me last time for going 9 days without blogging. And he doesn't even comment! shessh. I feel like I need to drink a gallon of water.

So Monday is D day, we'll see how hard we'll have to work to make next year a good year. ha.

I wanna go home and lay on my mom's couch...weird I know, but I wanna relax with my family. I really miss them and can't believe I haven't seen them since Spring break, I think it was the longest I went without seeing them, but I was so hurt when none of them came down for my birthday. BUT it'll be awesome to see them all again. Now if I could just see my boyfriend one of these days, ha.

A very old friend from high school sent me a random message warning me about a long distance relationship. Cos she was dating some Mormon from Utah that she met online. and he cheated on her and like got married. ha. Yeah, it's kinda different for me...ha people.

Well I'm going to take advantage of my internet at the moment and pay all my bills online before I'm blacked out and make sure everything looks good in the hood. much love.

Also, I want to go on a hike this summer and dip my feet somewhere, random I know...

No, I can't read that. I'm a Methodist

uggh. So I didn't really sleep last night, but I've been praying and begging God for peace about my current future... lots of issues and things to decide and contemplate.

On a happy note, 9 more days left of summer school! :) Then a month off, which is amazing, even if I don't have money to do anything, ha. One day I will. Hopefully a camping trip, time with friends and family.

Even though I complain about summer school and it's been pretty good. No real complaints. I am so glad to be moving though cos the lady across the hall smokes in her apartment all the time so our building smells like smoke, yuck!

Well, not much else to update on. I've been forcing myself to pack. I offically hate my cats...yeah. They're peeing everywhere, so they're probaly going to be out.

Ok, I need to get ready for church. peace. BUT I still have 15 minutes


Promise not to lie or erase any of these questions?
Sure

What should you be doing right now?
getting ready to church

Who was your last text message from?
Twitter

What are you listening to?
tv

Have you hugged/kissed someone in the past 5 days?
I've hugged a few people

Last time you felt bad about something?
today

Have you ever gone out of your way to make someone happy?
Yes I have

Last person you talked on the phone for more then an hour?
Kelly :) finally

Any plans for tomorow?
packing and the pool

Do you have a reason to smile right now?
Sureee

Is there someone who can ALWAYS make you smile?
Yesyes

What do you look for in the opposite sex?
There are quite a few things

Last time you laughed?
A few minutes ago

Why is your #1?
What lol

If you had a chance to go back in time would you?
Hmm, maybe

Last time you regretted something?
There's no need to regret anything

Favorite drink?
Mm, water and dr. pepper is good

Someone on your mind?
There are a few people I'm thinking about at the moment

Biggest fears?
I'm scared of a lot of things

Where do you wish you were right now?
sleeping on the beach

Song stuck in your head?
Not yet

Nervous for anything?
life

Does your crush like you back?
I think so, ha

Any plans for summer?
work, relaxing!

If you could have super powers, which would you choose?
Hmm

Who was the last person you had a conversation on the phone with?
Kelly

What color shirt are you wearing?
Green

What's the first thing you notice about the opposite sex?
Smile

Does the last person you kissed smoke?
No

Would you ever get a tattoo?
I dunno

If your boyfriend or girlfriend cheated on you, would you take them back?
Probably not, but I guess it would depend...

What's something you really want right now, be honest?
Hahah, a roommate?

Is there anything you want to tell someone but you can't?
I could, but I don't want to

Are you planning on having a kid?
Somedayyy

What do you currently hear?
whistling

Are you happy?
At the moment, yes

Do you feel like you're being forgotten?
no

Do you think anyone has feelings for you?
I think so

Who was the first person you talked to today?
Elma

Do you know what you are going to wear this weekend?
Um, I don't know.. clothes, bathing suit

What were you doing this morning at 8?
Taking the kids off the bus

What were you doing 15 minutes ago?
Sitting here

What are you wearing right now?
tank top and shorts

Are you mad at anyone?
No

Are you happy with your living arrangements?
somewhat

Last thing received in the mail?
netflix

How is your hair?
Up

Are you any good at math?
yea

Are you a jealous person?
not reallly

What were you doing last night at midnight?
trying to sleep

You're locked in a room with the person you last kissed, how is it?
:]

Have you ever been told that you were going to hell?
ha yes

How do you feel about your hair right now?
it's on my head

Do you think you can last in a relationship for six months?
yea

Do you like to have long hair or short hair?
I honestly love having long hair, I miss it :(

Do you fall for people easily?
No

Are you missing someone right now?
Yesss

Were you mad about the way you woke up this morning?
Yes

Are you good at hiding your feelings?
sometimes

Have you ever kissed anyone whose name started with J, I, or B?
nope

Have you cried this week at all?
yep

Are you afraid of falling in love?
No

God told me today would be a good day for tea

“I waited patiently for the LORD; he turned to me and heard my cry.” Psalm 40:1 (NIV)

I love this verse because it reminds me that God hears my cries and desires. He is always there. It’s up to me to believe that He'll answer my prayers. In James 5, the second half talks about of the prayer of Faith. Basically if we back our prayers with faith, God feels the sincerity of our hearts. I'm still waiting to find out the near future and praying everything will go well. I'm just here sitting, instead of worrying what is next, I'm sitting and listening for God and what he has to say. I’m waiting. I’m not going to be frantically running things in my head, but just patiently wait for the outcome of my situation. I'm praying for God’s Will to be revealed whatever the outcome is.
As I sit, wait, and pray, I am thankful for everything God has provided for me!

oh sweet thang!

Psalm 104: 1-4

1 Praise the LORD, O my soul.
O LORD my God, you are very great;
you are clothed with splendor and majesty.

2 He wraps himself in light as with a garment;
he stretches out the heavens like a tent

3 and lays the beams of his upper chambers on their waters.
He makes the clouds his chariot
and rides on the wings of the wind.

4 He makes winds his messengers,
flames of fire his servants.

well today was a sweet day. My first week of summer school is over. Which is pretty amazing! Then I took a 3 hour nap. I really need to get a lot of work done...I feel like my life is kinda insane right now...Just a lot to do, and at the moment I for some reason feel the need to get it all done right now.


I accidentally bought Mint brownies..I dunno if I'll like them or not but I guess I can try them.. So the cats have been locked into the bathroom for 2 days. They were mad and missed me. I let them out today and they keep falling me around. now they're both sleeping on me. silly cats. Ok. I'm gonna go pack and try to fill one closet and packed things tonight.